I'm Not Asleep, My Eyes Are Just Closed

I have been playing with my nearly 4 year old niece for a good two hours now and we're having a great time. At one point I lie on my stomach next to her on the floor when she promptly stands up and goes to lie down at the opposite end of the room. "Why did you run away from Auntie?" I asked Niece looks abashed (I didn't know nearly 4 year olds can look abashed) and points to her cheek, indicating the eczematous flare up on my left cheek. I am aghast. I know that my niece has a highly developed sense of aesthetics for a kid who isn't even in school, but for her to be revulsed by my appearance is just too much. I relate this to my sister-in-law who shrugs her shoulders and sighs in resignation. "This isn't the first time she's been so blatant. The other day in the tram, she pointed to a dwarf standing near us and said loudly, 'Mummy, why is that man so short?'I tried to distract her with something else but she kept pointing and repeating her que

I have left ole England and have safely arrived in Ireland to see my family and friend. I planned to stay here a month - the longest time I have ever spent in the company of my family since I have lived independently. As per usual, I never sleep properly prior to a trip anywhere nor could I eat breakfast this morning without feeling sick. But I eat anyway because I know I would feel worse if I get on the plane on an empty stomach. And as per usual I nodded off during the 30 minute flight. Mainly becuase I hardly slept last night, but also because I have a tendency to fall sleep when I'm sitting on any moving vehice (vehicles on water excepted). I think it has something to do with my parents putting us kids in the car and driving around till we fell asleep. I kept waking up though, because somewhere at the back of my brain I was still conscious that I was sleeping with my mouth gaping open and perpetually on the verge of drooling. I do not, however, know if I snored. I was once woke

This month, I have been listening to: You Give Me something - JAMES MORRISON SexyBack - JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE . Ooooh, Mr Trouser Snake himself. Trouble - RAY LAMONTAGNE Fill My Little World - THE FEELING I have also watched: Garden State - Ehhh. Nothing fantastic, but maybe I've been reading too many reviews and expecting too much. I can garner some sympathy for the over-anaesthetised Andrew Largeman (Zach Braff) and appreciate the tension between Large and his father (Ian Holm) whenever he briefly appears on-screen, but I watched most of the film feeling like I was on all the anti-psychotics Large was on. Robin Hood: Men In Tights - Why did I rent this film? How could I forget that I watched it before and didn't find it all that funny? I returned it without watching it till the end. Spirited Away - Japanese anime is always a little weird but worth watching because they rarely fit the usual Hollywood/Western storyline. Captivating story with interesting characters, beautiful an

Things that made me happy today: Nice day out in town with my friend Didn't have any arguments with said friend even though we discussed several controversial topics (good, considering we argue about the smallest things) Bought a lovely bag formyself - which was on sale! Ran 1km non-stop. Then ran another 1km non-stop. A kilometre probably isn't much for a lot of people but it is for me, the person that struggled to finish the 1500m in school. I'm hardly the adrenaline junkie, but all this recent exercise is my renewed bid to lose weight, get fit and to keep myself occupied while unemployed. It's not the easiest thing to keep some sort of structure to your day when every time you open your eyes in the morning you know you can roll over and go back to sleep becuase you don't have to go to work. You can stay in your jammies and watch re-runs of Scrubs and 8 Simple Rules all day. There is no reason to shower and to comb your hair. For the past two days I felt like I

Many years ago, I used to look with a bemused air at the women who ran around in a tizz like Bridget Jones over their men and their realtionships with them, and secretly looked down on all things chick-lit and all those who claim to enjoy that genre. As they say in life, what goes around comes around. Although I haven't rushed out to buy the entire works of Marian Keyes, for example, I have come to see why people write books like these and why so many enjoy buying and reading it. Yes, because I have questions too, and am starting to wonder. Many of my single, 20-something friends are getting....... I guess the word to use is, concerned, re: their single lifestyle. Not that we don't enjoy it, but there comes a point in your life when you think, "Hang on. Is this it?" Because no matter how independent, kick ass, superwoman, super feminist type of person you are, at the end of the day, everyone is looking for love and companionship, that special someone, the soulmate, th

Things that will give people the idea that you are planning a big dump: Go to the local shop half an hour before closing time and buy: 1. Bumper pack of toilet paper 2. Wholemeal bread 3. Newspaper For the record, I wasn’t. I honestly needed those things. (Edit: NOT for a dump!) Brought to you by Inappropriate Times, the paper for people who move. Not suitable for arse wiping.

I got home from work last Thursday morning feeling as if a rat had crawled in my mouth and died. I had pulled over into a service station as I was too sleepy to make the drive home and woke up in the mid-morning sun feeling not much better. As I pulled off my stinking scrubs and socks and dumped it in the laundry basket, I realised, "This is it. I am officially unemployed." Technically speaking of course, I was officially unemployed on Wednesday morning since that was when my contract ended, but this one locum job had been planned for a few weeks so I felt that there was some sort of .... well, order to my life still. Plus, I was on shift with my fancy man, The Chain-smoking Man, so it was something to look forward to. Only he wasn't much joy, being grumpy and out smoking most of the night. It probably would not be so worrying if there wasn't the whole visa thing as well. No work means no visa. So after nine years in this country, I have to uproot my entire life and g

Both my mum and her sister finished secondary school, which is somewhat unusual for women of their generation. But I wonder how much of that had to do with my grandad truly believing that they deserved education or the fact that because he was a school headmaster and therefore of a higher social standing, any daughter of his should be distinguished from the 'uneducated peasants'. My maternal grandparents unapologetically favoured their male children - they were never mean or neglectful towards their female ones, but there was never the same sense of pride, hope and expectation showed to their daughters that they showered on their sons. Bizarrely, my grandmother always put more faith and trust in her sons than her daughters. In fact when things when pear-shaped during my grandad's illness and subsequent death, it was her daughters that sorted her finances, organised and supervised the renovation of her house when my grandad couldn't manage the stairs and the kitchen got

So, there we were - three women in their late twenties, lounging on a faux-leather sofa having a nice post-prandial banter with a bunch of friends. Usually it would be just the three of us - me, Si and Em - talking about life, work and relationships - having that Bridget Jones moment which we thought would never come to us, because 'oh no, we're so above that!' But tonight was a farewell party for a friend who was off to Australia for a newer, better job in a newer, better place than sorry-ass England, and the talk frequently turned to career paths, professional exams, work-life balance etc. Cat was talking about a friend who works in computers who did not go to university because she thought it was a waste of time. Instead she plunged straight into work and gained experience and skills on the job. She is only a year older than me but she has been so successful that she has two homes in London and one in San Francisco where she now works from home and makes shedloads of mon