A short statement from Dean Winchester (a Supernatural post)

Hi, my name is Dean Winchester. I’m an Aquarius, I like long walks on the beach and frisky women. I used to be one hell of an ugly kid, but I grew up to be a handsome devil. I have a little brother, Sam, but he’s not so little really because I’m 6’ 1 and he’s still taller than me. He makes me look like a short arse, the freaky Sasquatch.

We were once a happy, normal family until my mother was killed when I was four years old. It could have been just an ordinary house fire except for the fact that my dad saw a yellow-eyed man pin my mother to a ceiling by an invisible force, made her bleed from the abdomen, and then set her and our family home on fire. My father, driven by grief and anger, spent the rest of his life, trying to find answers to who or what killed his wife. That mission would lead us all down a path we could never turn back from.



It turned out that this yellow-eyed man is a special type of demon who don’t die easy and is slippery as hell. That wasn’t the end of our problems though, because in Dad’s search for Mom’s killer, he found out all kinds of shit about other demons, ghosts, hoodoo, zombies and vampires. Dad, being an ex-marine, trained us both in demon hunting and the like, saving people and all, so that no one else had to go through the same things we did. Hell, I just like shooting stuff anyway, unlike my pansy brother who would rather talk about his feelings, play ball and go to law school.

So we had a pretty unusual childhood by other people’s standards. We grew up knowing that there were things that went bump in the night. We moved constantly, living in one motel after another, making a living from credit card fraud and hustling pool. Sam, the wuss, gets fed up of this one day, has a huge bust-up with Dad and heads off to Stanford University. He got a full scholarship too; he kept up with his school work despite moving schools several times. Guess that’s what you get when you’ve got your nose in a book all the time.

Anyway, one day Dad goes missing on one of his hunting trips and I pull Sam out of school to go look for Dad. We didn’t find him initially, got sidetracked by some murderous lady ghost, and when we got back, Sam’s girlfriend was on the ceiling, burning like Mom did. Oh and Sam has been getting visions of people dying, which eventually come true. So now we know this Yellow-Eyed Demon means business. He has a plan for world domination or something and he is going to use my brother Sam, and other psychic children like him to achieve his goals. We find Dad again by this point but the happy times didn’t last long because then, he exchanges his soul with the devil in order to save my life. That sucks balls, that, ‘cause it makes me feel guilty as hell and I’m all torn up inside but I gotta keep my game face on for Sam’s sake. Plus, I got my macho image to uphold.


Right now, we’re in ten kinds of trouble; not only do we have the usual hauntings and vengeful spirits to keep us busy, we’ve got the Feds after us because of all the fraud, grave desecrations and killings that we’ve been doing, other hunters are gunning for Sam because they think he’s some kind of demon spawn and the Yellow-Eyed Demon is closing in on us.

I don’t know if we’re going to get out of this alive, but whatever gets thrown at us, as long as I’ve got Sam and my salt-loaded shotgun, and Sam’s got me, we ain’t gonna let any sons of bitches bring us down. And that’s about as chick flick as I’m gonna get.